Tips for filling a beanbag

OPTION 1:
Equipment needed: piece of wire, kitchen knife, bag of beans (or old beanbag), beanbag.

Procedure:
* Start with the beanbag in any old place, perhaps where you left it last.
* Open the zipper of the beanbag using the piece of wire.
* Slash a hole in the bag of beans/old beanbag with the kitchen knife (or use any preexisting hole).
* Aim the hole at the zipper opening.
* Squeeze until you give up in frustration.

Beans spilled: Countless.

OPTION 2:
Equipment needed: scissors, pen, bag of beans, beanbag, bathtub, plug, knee, elbow.

Procedure:
* Put the plug in the empty bathtub and then place the beanbag inside.
* Open the zipper using the pen.
* Cut open a small corner of the bag of beans using the scissors.
* Put one foot on the edge of the bathtub and use your knee to keep the bag of beans in position with the cut-off corner inside the zipper opening.
* Use your elbow to squeeze the bag of beans like a bagpipe until the bag is empty.

Beans spilled: Zero.